Well, as the title says, Friday was an interesting day.
Kaitlyn decided she was going to be difficult, and difficult she was. The day started off just fine, Kaitlyn being herself, sticking to her normal schedule of awake and asleep time.
Mom decided to take me to my NST that was scheduled for that afternoon. We decided to eat out while we were out, then hit Walmart for a few things. Which we did. We ate about 11:30am, my NST was scheduled at 1:15pm.
We get to the NST and Squish decided it was nap time, she slept through the whole thing. Well, it's hard to pass a test when you sleep through it. So the doctor ordered a bio-physical profile - which Kaitlyn also decided she was sleeping through. We tried waking her up and she was having none of it.
The doctor told me to go get something with sugar, caffeine, and that was cold - then head to the hospital for another NST and bio-physical profile. I downed 1/2 a can of coke and headed over. Squish was wide awake for the NST - she passed with flying colors. The coke had her wide awake (it was about 4pm at this time). The sonographer gets up to labor and delivery to do the bio-physical profile and Kaitlyn falls right back to sleep.
The poor guy was there for 45 minutes trying to get her to move. Without her waking up and moving she would fail the profile, and if she failed the profile she was getting pulled out. Also, with her failing the profile it would mean an automatic c-section because they couldn't be sure she would survive a vaginal delivery.
I'm starting to get worried. If you've read this thing at all you know Kaitlyn is not the lazy baby we all would love to have. She's an over-actor and loves to punch and bounce and kick and beat me up. She loves to wiggle her way through everything and make getting things done as difficult as possible. I was starting to freak out a bit, okay, not a bit. At the same time, we've made it to 35 weeks - I'm 36 weeks now, I told her she was grounded until 35 weeks, so if it came down to them pulling her out, I was okay with that.
Good news is that, finally, at the end of the bio- 40 minutes after it started (the most they let it last is 45) Squish did a little bit of wiggling and was given a 8/8 on her bio. ROTTEN ROTTEN little girl!
After talking to the nurses, by now it was 5:30pm - they told me to eat and get some sugar in me and if she didn't wake up then to come back in. The assumption was that it had been 5 hours since I'd eaten, my blood sugar was probably low. They figured that the coke gave her a sugar spike and then it plummeted back down, which was why I was exhausted and she was sleeping.
We ate, and then she perked right up and so did I. So once again, we scraped by our tests, and we got to keep her in just a tad bit longer.
We have another NST scheduled for Tuesday. Then a growth scan scheduled Friday morning, and a NST for Friday afternoon. I have a feeling that Squish is probably going to be coming soon - I don't think she'll have grown that much as of Friday and they will be deciding to pull her out. I'm hoping I'm wrong because it means she's not thriving, but we will see.
In news about me:
-I'm here. :)
-I feel like a beached whale 95% of the time, and the other 5% of the time I feel like a really fat beached whale.
-For those guys who think that pregnant women have it easy - try strapping a beach ball to your belly that weighs 30 pounds and doing all your regular activities with it there. Just getting out of bed in the middle of the night is a feat sometimes. I have to move my legs then try to move my beach ball to the edge of the bed, THEN try heft me AND the 30 pound beach ball out of bed.
-I'm planning on having mom take some maternity pictures of me tomorrow to have them. Now that's a plan, not a sure thing.
-My back is killing me - I'll be honest with that. Squish has learned how to move just right and put pressure in all the "right" spots with my back. She squirms just right and it feels like she's trying to kill me sometimes. She also has this neat trick learned where she can hiccup and hit both of my sciatic nerves at the same time. LOADS of fun. The thing is - if it means having this little girl safely and happily in our lives, it's all worth it.
-I'm starving all the time again, but Squish is getting more and more finicky over what she'll let me eat. If she gives me a craving then it's either eat that, or eat nothing. It's a good thing she has yet to give me something I couldn't get to for a craving.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
Snickers are not night time food...
I found out last night that no matter how badly you want a snickers bar if you want any sleep (and are pregnant) do not eat it just prior to (trying to) go to sleep.
It never occurred to me how the sugar would hit Squish. It's probably the most sugar I've had in one sitting in two years - I thought it might upset my stomach, but never thought about Squishes. Turns out that a Snickers bar turns my daughter into a jumping bean. A jumping bean with really good arms and legs and feet that like to kick. I *tried* to go to sleep around 9:30pm - about 20 minutes after the Snickers... it was "wow she's moving a lot for this late at night". She just kept jumping and jiggling.
It wasn't until about 10:30pm that I started wondering where she got all this energy from. At about 11pm, my poor uterus getting super sore from the battering ram that was beating it to smithereens I starting wondering what my daughter was on that had her so frisky. At about midnight it dawned on me - DUH! snickers bar + baby = super hyper baby and no sleep.
She finally calmed down around 1am. So, I can say I have learned my lesson - no candy bars just before bedtime, no matter how good they sound. At the same time, I should bring a candy bar with me to her NST's and other tests in case she's thinking of sleeping through them. That or I decide to make the sonographer's work really hard and want to watch them struggle with my little super bouncy ball.
It never occurred to me how the sugar would hit Squish. It's probably the most sugar I've had in one sitting in two years - I thought it might upset my stomach, but never thought about Squishes. Turns out that a Snickers bar turns my daughter into a jumping bean. A jumping bean with really good arms and legs and feet that like to kick. I *tried* to go to sleep around 9:30pm - about 20 minutes after the Snickers... it was "wow she's moving a lot for this late at night". She just kept jumping and jiggling.
It wasn't until about 10:30pm that I started wondering where she got all this energy from. At about 11pm, my poor uterus getting super sore from the battering ram that was beating it to smithereens I starting wondering what my daughter was on that had her so frisky. At about midnight it dawned on me - DUH! snickers bar + baby = super hyper baby and no sleep.
She finally calmed down around 1am. So, I can say I have learned my lesson - no candy bars just before bedtime, no matter how good they sound. At the same time, I should bring a candy bar with me to her NST's and other tests in case she's thinking of sleeping through them. That or I decide to make the sonographer's work really hard and want to watch them struggle with my little super bouncy ball.
5/14 Could be 6 weeks, could be 2 days...
As of right now things with Squish are up in the air.
I posted two weeks ago about our last cervical length check, and the growth scan done on April 30th. A quick concise is that Squish was measuring smaller than they'd like, and not having shown any growth over a two week period. They also scheduled twice weekly NST's - and I posted about that as well.
Today was our follow up growth scan. I can tell you that I was nervous. I've had a feeling over the past few days that Squish is going to be on her way in the next two weeks. I even have my hospital bag mostly packed and ready to go - just in case.
Things today were not any better. Squish hasn't shown any real growth still. She is now measuring at only the 8th percentile. They gave me an estimate of about 4 pounds 8 ounces. There are a few things that are sort of in our favor. One is that the due date they perinatologist is using is 9 days earlier than the one that my regular OB is using. (I ovulated 9 days later than normal women do, the peri was using the day of my last period to base my due date on.) The other is that Squish is still in the breech position - the peri today explained to me that the averages they are using are based on babies measurements head down. When babies are breech their head measurements tend to run slightly smaller due to the angle of the ultrasound machine. The peri did also say that her stomach and femur measurements were small as well, but the head measurement would give us a little bit more weight. Both of those could be to our favor making her small, but not as small as she appears. It doesn't mean she's in good shape, just not necessarily as bad as it appears. (We'll take every little bit we can get, right?)
The good news is that Squish passed her bio-physical profile done during the ultrasound with flying colors. I think the ultrasound tech would have preferred her to not pass so well. Squish was wiggling and shaking up a storm during the sonogram - so (as usual) the measurements were taking longer than they should have. At one point it was chase that femur bone (thigh) bone as she kicked and wiggled. The bio-physical profile measures her heart rate, muscle tone, movement, breathing, and amniotic fluid - it's used to evaluate the overall health of the baby in the womb. We scored and 8 out of 8. That is great news. They also watch to check on Squish while she is in there and she was taking tons of practice breaths, which is great news! Just shows that all her hiccups are from her breathing and breathing over and over in there!
So what else did they say? Squishes is small. They are keeping a very close eye on her now. If Squish hadn't passed her bio with flying colors, she would have been pulled out. If at any point she does poorly on her NST she's getting pulled out of there. If she slows her movement down, she's getting pulled out. Right now it's all up to Squish, and how well she does. Their main concern is to make sure that she is in the best place for growth and maturing. If Kaitlyn doesn't improve her growth between now and the next growth scan - they will be taking her out. Some babies do better outside of the womb for whatever reason than they do inside.
Do they know why she's not growing? No. It could be a million things. They said awhile ago that it could be something to do with my gastric bypass surgery. It could be something with her umbilical cord - as far as they could see it's moving nutrients fine, but they can't tell everything. It could be a placenta problem... or any number of things. They don't know what it is. I was told to up my water in take, to eat as much as I can, and get in as many calories as possible, I've been making sure to sleep on my side (it helps blood and nutrient flow to the baby). There isn't much else we can do.
So - the next thing - I had a NST scheduled today also. Squish did NOT pass this NST with flying colors... she got a "so-so" score. I can honestly say that I don't think this one was as accurate as it could have been. Kaitlyn was wiggling and shaking the entire time, never really calming down for even a little bit. The test works by getting a baseline heart rate, and then when she moves, monitoring her rate increase against that. They like to see it increase 10-15 or more when she moves and wiggles. With her heart rate being up already, getting it up 15 more wasn't quite happening. She could get it up 10, but wasn't keeping it up 15 for very long. She didn't fail the test, or do too poorly, and she was moving a ton (a great sign) so he said we are just going to watch her.
So, it all comes down to whether or not we can get Squish to behave, and grow. I'd love for her to grow some more, and to bake a little bit longer, at the same time if this is God saying "it's time for her to enter the world" so be it. I trust that God will and has given the doctors the tools and the knowledge to make the best choices they can for her. It all comes down to God and Kaitlyn. I'm keeping a good "feel" for her movement, but she makes it pretty obvious she's wiggling and grooving in there. We are doing what we can for her, and getting as prepared as we can.
I know so many of you already are, but please, continue to keep us in your prayers. I'd really like to keep her baking longer, just because her brain isn't fully developed yet, right now it's only about 70% formed compared to what it would be at 37-40 weeks. She's also less than 5 pounds, and they don't normally allow babies under 5lbs 8oz to go home. I'd rather her not spend a lot of time in the NICU.
Thank you to everyone, for your thoughts, prayers, good wishes, and the things we've gotten for Squish.
I posted two weeks ago about our last cervical length check, and the growth scan done on April 30th. A quick concise is that Squish was measuring smaller than they'd like, and not having shown any growth over a two week period. They also scheduled twice weekly NST's - and I posted about that as well.
Today was our follow up growth scan. I can tell you that I was nervous. I've had a feeling over the past few days that Squish is going to be on her way in the next two weeks. I even have my hospital bag mostly packed and ready to go - just in case.
Things today were not any better. Squish hasn't shown any real growth still. She is now measuring at only the 8th percentile. They gave me an estimate of about 4 pounds 8 ounces. There are a few things that are sort of in our favor. One is that the due date they perinatologist is using is 9 days earlier than the one that my regular OB is using. (I ovulated 9 days later than normal women do, the peri was using the day of my last period to base my due date on.) The other is that Squish is still in the breech position - the peri today explained to me that the averages they are using are based on babies measurements head down. When babies are breech their head measurements tend to run slightly smaller due to the angle of the ultrasound machine. The peri did also say that her stomach and femur measurements were small as well, but the head measurement would give us a little bit more weight. Both of those could be to our favor making her small, but not as small as she appears. It doesn't mean she's in good shape, just not necessarily as bad as it appears. (We'll take every little bit we can get, right?)
The good news is that Squish passed her bio-physical profile done during the ultrasound with flying colors. I think the ultrasound tech would have preferred her to not pass so well. Squish was wiggling and shaking up a storm during the sonogram - so (as usual) the measurements were taking longer than they should have. At one point it was chase that femur bone (thigh) bone as she kicked and wiggled. The bio-physical profile measures her heart rate, muscle tone, movement, breathing, and amniotic fluid - it's used to evaluate the overall health of the baby in the womb. We scored and 8 out of 8. That is great news. They also watch to check on Squish while she is in there and she was taking tons of practice breaths, which is great news! Just shows that all her hiccups are from her breathing and breathing over and over in there!
So what else did they say? Squishes is small. They are keeping a very close eye on her now. If Squish hadn't passed her bio with flying colors, she would have been pulled out. If at any point she does poorly on her NST she's getting pulled out of there. If she slows her movement down, she's getting pulled out. Right now it's all up to Squish, and how well she does. Their main concern is to make sure that she is in the best place for growth and maturing. If Kaitlyn doesn't improve her growth between now and the next growth scan - they will be taking her out. Some babies do better outside of the womb for whatever reason than they do inside.
Do they know why she's not growing? No. It could be a million things. They said awhile ago that it could be something to do with my gastric bypass surgery. It could be something with her umbilical cord - as far as they could see it's moving nutrients fine, but they can't tell everything. It could be a placenta problem... or any number of things. They don't know what it is. I was told to up my water in take, to eat as much as I can, and get in as many calories as possible, I've been making sure to sleep on my side (it helps blood and nutrient flow to the baby). There isn't much else we can do.
So - the next thing - I had a NST scheduled today also. Squish did NOT pass this NST with flying colors... she got a "so-so" score. I can honestly say that I don't think this one was as accurate as it could have been. Kaitlyn was wiggling and shaking the entire time, never really calming down for even a little bit. The test works by getting a baseline heart rate, and then when she moves, monitoring her rate increase against that. They like to see it increase 10-15 or more when she moves and wiggles. With her heart rate being up already, getting it up 15 more wasn't quite happening. She could get it up 10, but wasn't keeping it up 15 for very long. She didn't fail the test, or do too poorly, and she was moving a ton (a great sign) so he said we are just going to watch her.
So, it all comes down to whether or not we can get Squish to behave, and grow. I'd love for her to grow some more, and to bake a little bit longer, at the same time if this is God saying "it's time for her to enter the world" so be it. I trust that God will and has given the doctors the tools and the knowledge to make the best choices they can for her. It all comes down to God and Kaitlyn. I'm keeping a good "feel" for her movement, but she makes it pretty obvious she's wiggling and grooving in there. We are doing what we can for her, and getting as prepared as we can.
I know so many of you already are, but please, continue to keep us in your prayers. I'd really like to keep her baking longer, just because her brain isn't fully developed yet, right now it's only about 70% formed compared to what it would be at 37-40 weeks. She's also less than 5 pounds, and they don't normally allow babies under 5lbs 8oz to go home. I'd rather her not spend a lot of time in the NICU.
Thank you to everyone, for your thoughts, prayers, good wishes, and the things we've gotten for Squish.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
NST - Non-Stress Test
So today Kaitlyn and I had our first "NST" it's a "Non-Stress Test". Today was the first of twice-weekly NST's that we will be having until Squish is born. The primary reason NST's are done is to make sure that your baby's heart rate is reacting properly to their movement and stimulus. Basically it takes adequate oxygen for the baby to move properly, and for the heart to react properly to the babies movement. A bad NST could be a sign of problems with the placenta or umbilical cord. The NST's will also help us make sure that Squish is fine, even if she is small. It's sort of like reassurance that even if she isn't growing much, she is doing okay in me.
I was a little nervous, not sure exactly what would be happening during the test, and how. We found out today.
Basically I got taken over to a little cubical type thing at Sun Life (my regular OB office). They sat me in this nice recliner and hooked me up to two different machines. One of the machines was for monitoring, and seeing if I was having contractions. The other was a machine that monitored Squishes heart rate and printed it out on paper. They also gave me a cord hooked up to the heart rate monitor, it had a button and each time I felt Squishes move I had to press the button.
It took the nurse a little bit to get the heart monitor in the spot where it picked up Kaitlyn's heart rate consistently. I still ended up having to hold the monitor in place and angle it to keep track of it.
I can honestly say it was great getting to sit there for 1/2 hour, just listening to Squishes little heart beat. It's a sound that meant so much up until the end with Christopher, and hearing it so strong and constant is incredible. The other awesome thing was listening to how her heart rate changed as she got to wiggling. Her resting heart rate was 135-140 (or so says the machine) - when she got to really wiggling it got all the way up in the 170's. I can't say how neat it was to not just feel, but hear the movement in her heart beat.
I'm thinking next time I'm in there I'll try to see if I can get my cell phone to take a video of it - that way I can share the sound of her heart beat with everyone.
We passed the test with flying colors. So Squish is already an honor student.
We have another NST on Friday, and one each Tuesday and Friday from now on.
I was a little nervous, not sure exactly what would be happening during the test, and how. We found out today.
Basically I got taken over to a little cubical type thing at Sun Life (my regular OB office). They sat me in this nice recliner and hooked me up to two different machines. One of the machines was for monitoring, and seeing if I was having contractions. The other was a machine that monitored Squishes heart rate and printed it out on paper. They also gave me a cord hooked up to the heart rate monitor, it had a button and each time I felt Squishes move I had to press the button.
It took the nurse a little bit to get the heart monitor in the spot where it picked up Kaitlyn's heart rate consistently. I still ended up having to hold the monitor in place and angle it to keep track of it.
I can honestly say it was great getting to sit there for 1/2 hour, just listening to Squishes little heart beat. It's a sound that meant so much up until the end with Christopher, and hearing it so strong and constant is incredible. The other awesome thing was listening to how her heart rate changed as she got to wiggling. Her resting heart rate was 135-140 (or so says the machine) - when she got to really wiggling it got all the way up in the 170's. I can't say how neat it was to not just feel, but hear the movement in her heart beat.
I'm thinking next time I'm in there I'll try to see if I can get my cell phone to take a video of it - that way I can share the sound of her heart beat with everyone.
We passed the test with flying colors. So Squish is already an honor student.
We have another NST on Friday, and one each Tuesday and Friday from now on.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
33 weeks! We're measuring a little tiny...
April 30, 2010
Well, I had yet another cervical length check today. (I know I have been really bad about posting here for a long time... I blame it on Squishes - turns out if I listen to people she's an excuse for EVERYTHING.)
Anyways - yes, another appointment to get my cervical length checked, and to check on Kaitlyn's growth. The good news is that my cervix grew - yes - GREW. I went from 12mm two weeks ago on the 16th (very very bad, almost hospitalization bad) to 20mm today. 20mm isn't good - they like numbers of 30mm-40mm. 25mm is considered the danger zone. BUT my cervix grew. I really have to thank my mom for that. She's been such a huge blessing here, constantly reminding me to stop doing this or that, and doing lots of things I've been doing that I shouldn't have been.
Turns out, I couldn't just get good news. Nope. Squish likes her attention - so she's got to be a little drama queen. I got worrisome news. I didn't get what her weight/measurements were, but Kaitlyn is only measuring at the 14th percentile. Which means that 86% of babies at 33 weeks are bigger than she is - she's measuring tiny. She has barely grown any at all since the 16th. There are a few different things that can mess with her growth. One is that my body simply isn't processing things correctly, so I am working my best at eating more, and more often. (You can ask, I'm already gnawing at the walls and such, I'm eating!) Another is that the placenta isn't doing something right, then is the chance that the umbilical cord isn't transferring nutrients to her correctly (could be pinched, or pressed, or just slow), it could be somehow blood simply isn't getting to her the way it should, or he mentioned (I have never heard of this) that there is a possibility that the cerclage is restricting bloodflow to her somehow. I got back in two weeks for another growth scan - and if things still aren't looking good they will order further testing, and there is talk of the cerclage coming out, or if they decide Squish will do better outside of me they will pull her out.
On top of this worrying news - this would be the one time in Kaitlyn's existence she decided to be lazy. Go figure. They were worried over her lack of growth so they wanted to check her movement and make sure she was practicing breathing and such. KELLEY's rotten little girl refused to budge. We tried everything, my belly looked like a bowl of jello in the middle of a level 9 earth quake with all the wiggling, bouncing we were doing and she just kept on sleeping. We got her to stretch a few times, sort of like she said that's irritating, I'm going back to bed. We tried really cold water (that normally gets her up turning my bladder to a pulp) - nothing. The sonographer was watching for signs that she was practicing breathing - in 30 minutes we only got 4-5 breathes, not good. At least we got that, but it wasn't good. She said that based on the fact I had a bad night, Squish might just be tired and comfy. Since she was moving, her heart looked good, and they did get some breathing they told me to give it a couple hours.
If in 2 hours she hadn't woken up and started moving her normal amount I was to head into labor and delivery to possibly be admitted, at the least get hooked up and have her checked out. I asked if I needed to be worried - they said that IF she didn't start moving like normal soon, then just to go get her checked out. IF they were worried, I would already be on the way to the hospital - but she could she just be in a lazy mood. I told the sonographer about how often she gets the hiccups - I'd read they only get the hiccups from practicing breathing - she confirmed it and said that if she gets the hiccups we are golden. I won't lie - I was freaking out. I was doing my best to not freak out, and it wasn't working. I mean my little brat who always moves and wiggles wasn't wiggling.
So... we decided maybe she needs some sugar, caffeine, and food - we head to Taco Bell (yum - taco bell.....) I eat, and about 10 minutes later the little bratty whirlwind is turning my insides to mush with all her moving. Go figure. 45 minutes at the doctors office and nothing - we beg, we plead, princess sleeps. I have to go pee - so she starts kicking ... Still no hiccups - so I'm going - so she's moving but she's not practice breathing - if they have to pull her she NEEDS to be breathing. Then she gets the hiccups. I must have ended up with the stupidest, biggest grin in the world on my face right then.
Now I'm actually keeping a hiccup log, and a movement count log. They told me awhile ago to set aside an hour period a few times ago and to count 10 movements in an hour, if I don't get them drink something cold and sugary and start over. Well with Squishes, I get 10 kicks in a minute, so it was easy. Now I'm being paranoid - so I'm setting aside 10 minute sessions here and there and counting her karate chops - forget waiting the whole hour. I was up to 45 some-odd beatings to random organs in 10 minutes last night.... I'm also writing down each time I feel her get the hiccups, and how long it lasts. I can tell you that she does NOT like the hiccups - every 3rd or 4th one she does a little freak-out dance like she's trying to fight them away. I can't say that I blame her - I'm not to big on them either.
So, things are better, and worrier. My cervix is longer (yay!) but she's measuring small. I suppose we shall see in two weeks how we are doing. I have heard that fetal measurements can be off pretty often, so I could go in two weeks and be told I have a massive baby girl! She's measured smallish the entire pregnancy, so her being a bit smaller isn't a big deal, I just want to make sure she's growing like she should be. So keep her in your prayers! GROW SQUISH GROW! Good news is - she might be small but she sure is feisty!
Well, I had yet another cervical length check today. (I know I have been really bad about posting here for a long time... I blame it on Squishes - turns out if I listen to people she's an excuse for EVERYTHING.)
Anyways - yes, another appointment to get my cervical length checked, and to check on Kaitlyn's growth. The good news is that my cervix grew - yes - GREW. I went from 12mm two weeks ago on the 16th (very very bad, almost hospitalization bad) to 20mm today. 20mm isn't good - they like numbers of 30mm-40mm. 25mm is considered the danger zone. BUT my cervix grew. I really have to thank my mom for that. She's been such a huge blessing here, constantly reminding me to stop doing this or that, and doing lots of things I've been doing that I shouldn't have been.
Turns out, I couldn't just get good news. Nope. Squish likes her attention - so she's got to be a little drama queen. I got worrisome news. I didn't get what her weight/measurements were, but Kaitlyn is only measuring at the 14th percentile. Which means that 86% of babies at 33 weeks are bigger than she is - she's measuring tiny. She has barely grown any at all since the 16th. There are a few different things that can mess with her growth. One is that my body simply isn't processing things correctly, so I am working my best at eating more, and more often. (You can ask, I'm already gnawing at the walls and such, I'm eating!) Another is that the placenta isn't doing something right, then is the chance that the umbilical cord isn't transferring nutrients to her correctly (could be pinched, or pressed, or just slow), it could be somehow blood simply isn't getting to her the way it should, or he mentioned (I have never heard of this) that there is a possibility that the cerclage is restricting bloodflow to her somehow. I got back in two weeks for another growth scan - and if things still aren't looking good they will order further testing, and there is talk of the cerclage coming out, or if they decide Squish will do better outside of me they will pull her out.
On top of this worrying news - this would be the one time in Kaitlyn's existence she decided to be lazy. Go figure. They were worried over her lack of growth so they wanted to check her movement and make sure she was practicing breathing and such. KELLEY's rotten little girl refused to budge. We tried everything, my belly looked like a bowl of jello in the middle of a level 9 earth quake with all the wiggling, bouncing we were doing and she just kept on sleeping. We got her to stretch a few times, sort of like she said that's irritating, I'm going back to bed. We tried really cold water (that normally gets her up turning my bladder to a pulp) - nothing. The sonographer was watching for signs that she was practicing breathing - in 30 minutes we only got 4-5 breathes, not good. At least we got that, but it wasn't good. She said that based on the fact I had a bad night, Squish might just be tired and comfy. Since she was moving, her heart looked good, and they did get some breathing they told me to give it a couple hours.
If in 2 hours she hadn't woken up and started moving her normal amount I was to head into labor and delivery to possibly be admitted, at the least get hooked up and have her checked out. I asked if I needed to be worried - they said that IF she didn't start moving like normal soon, then just to go get her checked out. IF they were worried, I would already be on the way to the hospital - but she could she just be in a lazy mood. I told the sonographer about how often she gets the hiccups - I'd read they only get the hiccups from practicing breathing - she confirmed it and said that if she gets the hiccups we are golden. I won't lie - I was freaking out. I was doing my best to not freak out, and it wasn't working. I mean my little brat who always moves and wiggles wasn't wiggling.
So... we decided maybe she needs some sugar, caffeine, and food - we head to Taco Bell (yum - taco bell.....) I eat, and about 10 minutes later the little bratty whirlwind is turning my insides to mush with all her moving. Go figure. 45 minutes at the doctors office and nothing - we beg, we plead, princess sleeps. I have to go pee - so she starts kicking ... Still no hiccups - so I'm going - so she's moving but she's not practice breathing - if they have to pull her she NEEDS to be breathing. Then she gets the hiccups. I must have ended up with the stupidest, biggest grin in the world on my face right then.
Now I'm actually keeping a hiccup log, and a movement count log. They told me awhile ago to set aside an hour period a few times ago and to count 10 movements in an hour, if I don't get them drink something cold and sugary and start over. Well with Squishes, I get 10 kicks in a minute, so it was easy. Now I'm being paranoid - so I'm setting aside 10 minute sessions here and there and counting her karate chops - forget waiting the whole hour. I was up to 45 some-odd beatings to random organs in 10 minutes last night.... I'm also writing down each time I feel her get the hiccups, and how long it lasts. I can tell you that she does NOT like the hiccups - every 3rd or 4th one she does a little freak-out dance like she's trying to fight them away. I can't say that I blame her - I'm not to big on them either.
So, things are better, and worrier. My cervix is longer (yay!) but she's measuring small. I suppose we shall see in two weeks how we are doing. I have heard that fetal measurements can be off pretty often, so I could go in two weeks and be told I have a massive baby girl! She's measured smallish the entire pregnancy, so her being a bit smaller isn't a big deal, I just want to make sure she's growing like she should be. So keep her in your prayers! GROW SQUISH GROW! Good news is - she might be small but she sure is feisty!
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Shower, Registry, Squish and me too!
Kelley and I have been getting quite a few questions about all things Squish lately. I figured that this would be the best way to get them answered all at once.
Kaitlyn's Baby Shower Info:
Date: May 1st, 2010 (Saturday)
Time: 2:00PM - 6:00PM
Where: Countryside Community Club
9151 N Bald Eagle
Tucson, Arizona 85742
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE RSVP as soon as possible! You can RSVP by emailing or sending me a message via facebook. From what I'm hearing most people have gotten their invites over the past week or so. You can also call Candace (the amazing woman throwing us the shower) at 520-471-8531 to RSVP. The shower is coed, and if you have kids they are welcome, we just really need to know how many to expect so we can plan food and such.
Are we registered anywhere?
Yes. Kelley and I have registered.
We are registered at Wal-Mart, Target, and Amazon.com. You can view and select items for all three via the internet, you can also shop in store at Wal-Mart and Target. The information for all three is pretty easy to find our registry. Use Tammy Doern or Kelley Doern as the registrant name. State, of course, is Arizona. If you need to know Kaitlyn's due date is June 19th, 2010.
Does the nursery have a theme? Do you have likes or dislikes?
After looking around for awhile Kelley and I decided to have a jungle themed nursery. We fell in love with the Fisher-Price "Rain Forest" collection, and it's partner the "Precious Planet" collection (also by Fisher-Price). It has the bright, bold colors we were looking for, it has gotten great safety reviews, and awesome reviews from parents. We've registered for a lot of those items.
We have also registered for the Dr. Brown's line of bottle products - reflux and GERD runs in my family and those are the bottles that helped both of my nephews out.
Sensitive skin runs in the family also, and mom says that Pampers were the only diapers that didn't make us break out, so we also registered for the Pampers "Swaddlers" diapers. (The dry-max diapers are thinner and more earth friendly for those interested.)
I have yet to register for many clothes, and will be adding some. At the same time I figured if people saw something they liked they didn't need me to tell them it was cute. Just please keep in mind that babies grow up in size very quickly - there are so many hours in a day to have her newborn clothes.
How is Squish doing?
Squish is a firecracker. She is definitely keeping me on my toes. I never knew that babies would have personalities before they were born, but Kaitlyn definitely does. She is a very finicky baby.
The funny thing is that her nickname is "Squish" and it is one thing she absolutely hates - she cannot stand being 'squished' in any form. If my pant waist is pushing in on her she freaks out, if my seat belt gets tight she fights it. Just my leaning up against the counters to clean the back, and that bit of counter pushing on her gets her throwing punches. We have a fetal heart monitor (to listen to her heartbeat) and you tighten it up against your belly, that was the first time I SAW her kicks outside, she was beating that thing to pieces from the inside.
How is mommy doing?
I'm doing good so far. I've considered myself really lucky in the cervix department until here lately. I managed, despite the incompetent cervix, to get so far without being on strict bed rest the whole time. I've gotten by, until this point, by just taking it as easy as I can manage.
My last cervical length sucked, it's down to 1.6cm - not good. I was told in the beginning that 2.5cm was a "dangerous" cervical length... so I'm a little bit lower than dangerous. I was hoping I had heard them wrong, but after my doctor appointment today it was confirmed, my cervical length sucks. The good news is that there is no funneling, and the cerclage is still holding strong, doing it's job. The bad news is that I'm now allowed no more than an hour a day on my feet, and I was told in no more than 15 minute sections - and to try to avoid the on my feet time as much as possible. So, the couch, bed and my rear who were on friendly terms before, are going to be getting even better acquainted. (yay!?)
I am 30 weeks now - 2 weeks beyond "gravy" but not close to the safe zone. If Kaitlyn insisted on coming into the world now she would have a very good chance of making it - she would also end up with minimal disabilities. At the same time I plan on keeping her baking until 35 weeks, even if that means duct taping my cervix closed. (I really do think it's something they should consider, duct tape fixes everything right?) If I can hold her captive until 35 weeks they will allow her to be delivered here in Casa Grande, if she comes before then she will have to spend a lot of time at Tucson Medical Center in the NICU, and I would rather her not have to spend her first while hooked up to machines.
Thank you everyone, for your continued thoughts and prayers. I also ask that you please keep us in them. Every day that she stays put is another blessing, it means she gets to grow a little more, we get to pretend that we are making progress in the baby gear department and getting the nursery set up, and she gets to develop more. Also, keep Kelley and his sanity in your thoughts - poor guy has to put up with me, pregnant, hormonal, and now on most strict bed rest.
If you know anyone who would want to know this information, feel free to pass this on!
Kaitlyn's Baby Shower Info:
Date: May 1st, 2010 (Saturday)
Time: 2:00PM - 6:00PM
Where: Countryside Community Club
9151 N Bald Eagle
Tucson, Arizona 85742
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE RSVP as soon as possible! You can RSVP by emailing or sending me a message via facebook. From what I'm hearing most people have gotten their invites over the past week or so. You can also call Candace (the amazing woman throwing us the shower) at 520-471-8531 to RSVP. The shower is coed, and if you have kids they are welcome, we just really need to know how many to expect so we can plan food and such.
Are we registered anywhere?
Yes. Kelley and I have registered.
We are registered at Wal-Mart, Target, and Amazon.com. You can view and select items for all three via the internet, you can also shop in store at Wal-Mart and Target. The information for all three is pretty easy to find our registry. Use Tammy Doern or Kelley Doern as the registrant name. State, of course, is Arizona. If you need to know Kaitlyn's due date is June 19th, 2010.
Does the nursery have a theme? Do you have likes or dislikes?
After looking around for awhile Kelley and I decided to have a jungle themed nursery. We fell in love with the Fisher-Price "Rain Forest" collection, and it's partner the "Precious Planet" collection (also by Fisher-Price). It has the bright, bold colors we were looking for, it has gotten great safety reviews, and awesome reviews from parents. We've registered for a lot of those items.
We have also registered for the Dr. Brown's line of bottle products - reflux and GERD runs in my family and those are the bottles that helped both of my nephews out.
Sensitive skin runs in the family also, and mom says that Pampers were the only diapers that didn't make us break out, so we also registered for the Pampers "Swaddlers" diapers. (The dry-max diapers are thinner and more earth friendly for those interested.)
I have yet to register for many clothes, and will be adding some. At the same time I figured if people saw something they liked they didn't need me to tell them it was cute. Just please keep in mind that babies grow up in size very quickly - there are so many hours in a day to have her newborn clothes.
How is Squish doing?
Squish is a firecracker. She is definitely keeping me on my toes. I never knew that babies would have personalities before they were born, but Kaitlyn definitely does. She is a very finicky baby.
The funny thing is that her nickname is "Squish" and it is one thing she absolutely hates - she cannot stand being 'squished' in any form. If my pant waist is pushing in on her she freaks out, if my seat belt gets tight she fights it. Just my leaning up against the counters to clean the back, and that bit of counter pushing on her gets her throwing punches. We have a fetal heart monitor (to listen to her heartbeat) and you tighten it up against your belly, that was the first time I SAW her kicks outside, she was beating that thing to pieces from the inside.
How is mommy doing?
I'm doing good so far. I've considered myself really lucky in the cervix department until here lately. I managed, despite the incompetent cervix, to get so far without being on strict bed rest the whole time. I've gotten by, until this point, by just taking it as easy as I can manage.
My last cervical length sucked, it's down to 1.6cm - not good. I was told in the beginning that 2.5cm was a "dangerous" cervical length... so I'm a little bit lower than dangerous. I was hoping I had heard them wrong, but after my doctor appointment today it was confirmed, my cervical length sucks. The good news is that there is no funneling, and the cerclage is still holding strong, doing it's job. The bad news is that I'm now allowed no more than an hour a day on my feet, and I was told in no more than 15 minute sections - and to try to avoid the on my feet time as much as possible. So, the couch, bed and my rear who were on friendly terms before, are going to be getting even better acquainted. (yay!?)
I am 30 weeks now - 2 weeks beyond "gravy" but not close to the safe zone. If Kaitlyn insisted on coming into the world now she would have a very good chance of making it - she would also end up with minimal disabilities. At the same time I plan on keeping her baking until 35 weeks, even if that means duct taping my cervix closed. (I really do think it's something they should consider, duct tape fixes everything right?) If I can hold her captive until 35 weeks they will allow her to be delivered here in Casa Grande, if she comes before then she will have to spend a lot of time at Tucson Medical Center in the NICU, and I would rather her not have to spend her first while hooked up to machines.
Thank you everyone, for your continued thoughts and prayers. I also ask that you please keep us in them. Every day that she stays put is another blessing, it means she gets to grow a little more, we get to pretend that we are making progress in the baby gear department and getting the nursery set up, and she gets to develop more. Also, keep Kelley and his sanity in your thoughts - poor guy has to put up with me, pregnant, hormonal, and now on most strict bed rest.
If you know anyone who would want to know this information, feel free to pass this on!
Friday, April 9, 2010
Kisses, love and fate.
The first thing I want to say is that yes, I have been slacking in the blogging department. I'm fully well aware of that fact. Truth be told I have a few 1/4 done blogs - and then I got distracted with something (pretty easy to do) and stopped. I WILL be finishing those soon, I think.
The reason I'm writing today is that this is a special day for me. Today is April 9th, 2010. I thought the important day was yesterday, but after looking through some old emails/writing I realized today was the day.
10 years ago today was the day my life changed forever.
I had been injured at work, and couldn't use my right arm. I was doing the whole photographer thing then, and I'm right handed so I wasn't worth a whole lot. The doctor I saw put me on the bench for two weeks, longer if my arm didn't get better quickly enough.
I had some free time. At this time Kelley and I were still just friends. We spoke occasionally on the phone, and did a lot of emailing and IMing. (Instant Messaging)
Right after I'd hurt my arm I got a call from Kelley. We were chatting like we normally did, nothing unusual. I mentioned my arm and how I was out of work for a little while.
Kelley was still in the Army at this time, and they had been preparing to head to a training school for a month long. Word came down the chain of command that for whatever reason the birds (helicopters) with his unit were grounded (couldn't fly). His entire unit was told that since they had planned the schooling, and schooling got canceled their calendar was empty for the next month. If they wanted to take leave, now would be the time to do it.
A long standing joke between Kelley and I was that every phone call I would ask him when he was coming to see me. I never actually expected him to come and visit. Kelley put in for his leave. The one condition was that if got his way out here, I had to get him home.
It amazes me even more now, considering we were just good friends at the time, that Kelley rode on a greyhound bus 24 hours for this visit. He sat, on his bum, for 24 hours for me. To spend time with a friend.
Kelley arrived near midnight on April 6th, which is my birthday. It was a great present. I remember him joking at one point about how I "never expected to get a Kelley for my birthday".
So what is so important about April 10th?
Kelley and I were hanging out upstairs in my room. I'd taken some medication for my arm that knocked me out pretty darn good. Kelley was sitting on the bed, I was laying down, and we were watching a lightning storm out the windows. I had drifted off to sleep.
I thought it was a dream, and felt something on my lips. Then in a soft voice I heard, "well it worked for Prince Charming." I opened my eyes groggily and a few seconds later Kelley kissed me again.
It was that moment that I *knew* without a shadow of a doubt that I was in love. I knew that Kelley was the one. My entire life WAS that kiss. Kelley was the one I was going to spend the rest of my life with, there was no other option.
Here we are, 10 years to the day later - and he is still the love of my life. People say the newness, the passion, the power, that flood of emotions you get in the beginning of a relationship wears off. Not for me. I still get butterflies when Kelley kisses me. All that power is still there, but on top of it all is the warmth of being best friends. I still get all the rushing emotions, the want and power of passion; but I also get the tenderness of affection, love, and trust.
It's been 10 years, and so many ask "what would you do differently?" I can't say that I would. I can honestly say that I wouldn't change a thing. Changing so much as one breeze could change it all, and I'm amazed and feel blessed every single morning to be with him.
There are people out there who question things - they simply say "coincidence". Let those who choose to believe that way do so. I know that it was God's very hand that brought us together. Circumstances don't just turn out that way.
Any other time in our lives would not have been "right". I know had he visited earlier I wouldn't have been ready, or mature enough, to follow my heart that way. Any later and who's to say he would have kissed me at all? If his birds hadn't been downed, my arm not injured? God fated us to be together, and together we are.
It amazes me each day to know I can kiss him just because. I'm blessed every single time I can reach out and hold his hand, and I still feel that tingle.
There are people out there who spend their entire life searching for exactly what we have.
There's a song called "Living in a Moment" - a line from that song is:
"When they carve my stone all they need write on it,
is once lived a man who got all he ever wanted.
Tell me something, who could ask for more
Than to be living in a moment you would die for?"
How many people would die for the type I love we have. How many people would give their all to feel, just once, what I feel each time I think of Kelley?
I could live forever on the emotions and power I felt in that first kiss. God has blessed, me more than there are words to say, in that I don't have to.
The reason I'm writing today is that this is a special day for me. Today is April 9th, 2010. I thought the important day was yesterday, but after looking through some old emails/writing I realized today was the day.
10 years ago today was the day my life changed forever.
I had been injured at work, and couldn't use my right arm. I was doing the whole photographer thing then, and I'm right handed so I wasn't worth a whole lot. The doctor I saw put me on the bench for two weeks, longer if my arm didn't get better quickly enough.
I had some free time. At this time Kelley and I were still just friends. We spoke occasionally on the phone, and did a lot of emailing and IMing. (Instant Messaging)
Right after I'd hurt my arm I got a call from Kelley. We were chatting like we normally did, nothing unusual. I mentioned my arm and how I was out of work for a little while.
Kelley was still in the Army at this time, and they had been preparing to head to a training school for a month long. Word came down the chain of command that for whatever reason the birds (helicopters) with his unit were grounded (couldn't fly). His entire unit was told that since they had planned the schooling, and schooling got canceled their calendar was empty for the next month. If they wanted to take leave, now would be the time to do it.
A long standing joke between Kelley and I was that every phone call I would ask him when he was coming to see me. I never actually expected him to come and visit. Kelley put in for his leave. The one condition was that if got his way out here, I had to get him home.
It amazes me even more now, considering we were just good friends at the time, that Kelley rode on a greyhound bus 24 hours for this visit. He sat, on his bum, for 24 hours for me. To spend time with a friend.
Kelley arrived near midnight on April 6th, which is my birthday. It was a great present. I remember him joking at one point about how I "never expected to get a Kelley for my birthday".
So what is so important about April 10th?
Kelley and I were hanging out upstairs in my room. I'd taken some medication for my arm that knocked me out pretty darn good. Kelley was sitting on the bed, I was laying down, and we were watching a lightning storm out the windows. I had drifted off to sleep.
I thought it was a dream, and felt something on my lips. Then in a soft voice I heard, "well it worked for Prince Charming." I opened my eyes groggily and a few seconds later Kelley kissed me again.
It was that moment that I *knew* without a shadow of a doubt that I was in love. I knew that Kelley was the one. My entire life WAS that kiss. Kelley was the one I was going to spend the rest of my life with, there was no other option.
Here we are, 10 years to the day later - and he is still the love of my life. People say the newness, the passion, the power, that flood of emotions you get in the beginning of a relationship wears off. Not for me. I still get butterflies when Kelley kisses me. All that power is still there, but on top of it all is the warmth of being best friends. I still get all the rushing emotions, the want and power of passion; but I also get the tenderness of affection, love, and trust.
It's been 10 years, and so many ask "what would you do differently?" I can't say that I would. I can honestly say that I wouldn't change a thing. Changing so much as one breeze could change it all, and I'm amazed and feel blessed every single morning to be with him.
There are people out there who question things - they simply say "coincidence". Let those who choose to believe that way do so. I know that it was God's very hand that brought us together. Circumstances don't just turn out that way.
Any other time in our lives would not have been "right". I know had he visited earlier I wouldn't have been ready, or mature enough, to follow my heart that way. Any later and who's to say he would have kissed me at all? If his birds hadn't been downed, my arm not injured? God fated us to be together, and together we are.
It amazes me each day to know I can kiss him just because. I'm blessed every single time I can reach out and hold his hand, and I still feel that tingle.
There are people out there who spend their entire life searching for exactly what we have.
There's a song called "Living in a Moment" - a line from that song is:
"When they carve my stone all they need write on it,
is once lived a man who got all he ever wanted.
Tell me something, who could ask for more
Than to be living in a moment you would die for?"
How many people would die for the type I love we have. How many people would give their all to feel, just once, what I feel each time I think of Kelley?
I could live forever on the emotions and power I felt in that first kiss. God has blessed, me more than there are words to say, in that I don't have to.
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