Follow up OB visit

Yesterday (Friday) was my follow up appointment with Dr. Leeds. I was supposed to return to see her within two weeks, but to be honest just couldn't make the appointment. I finally did, and returned to see her.

Dr. Leeds and I talked about a lot of the questions I've had and it made me feel better that she agrees on most things with me.

She asked me if I was on birth control, as we have to wait two full cycles to try again. I told her that I didn't see the point of starting taking pills that take a month to work, just to stop taking them again. She agreed on that, as long as we used protection.

I asked her about a question I had based on what a nurse at the hospital said. The nurse had said that they would monitor my cervical length weekly, and if it changed they would then put the cerclage in. That wasn't good enough for me. I had an ultrasound Friday showing everything fine, and my cervix had opened by Wednesday. I told her I wanted the cerclage in as soon as possible, I'm not willing to risk this happening again. She said that sounded like a reasonable request given my situation and she supported me in that.

Not sure how many are actually reading this - but another thing she made sure I understood was that the cerclage would not be put in before as soon as we find out we are pregnant. I understand this, but for some it might not make sense. Statistically about 1/3 of pregnancies end in miscarriage - most of those being before the woman has even missed her period, or realized she could possibly be pregnant. 90%ish of miscarriages occur during the first trimester (no these aren't hard fact numbers just guestimates of what I've been told/read). These losses are normally due to their being a problem/birth defect with the baby that our bodies know, not a problem with the mother. Doctors do not want to preform the cerclage surgery on a mother, risking infection and all the risks of surgery, for her body to naturally miscarry the baby. If they do that the mom risks infection and worse from her body holding in a baby that has miscarried, and they won't know until the next time she has an ultrasound done. I'm not sure if I explained that well enough, hope it makes sense.

Dr. Leeds also let me know that at 14 weeks I would start getting weekly shots. The shots would be to help the baby mature quicker. It will help the babies lungs, heart and such become stronger so that baby has a better chance of surviving if we end up giving birth early again.

She also mentioned they have medication I would be given to prevent contractions as well.

I thanked Dr. Leeds, again, for letting Kelley and I fight for Christopher. Even when all the high risk doctors she spoke to were telling her to force us to induce right away, Dr. Leeds let us at least TRY to see if Chris could be saved. Giving us the opportunity to fight, to see if things could get better, helped us more than words could ever say. We know that we didn't just give up, we know we did everything we could to save our son, if she hadn't allowed us that we would forever have been asking "what if". The answer I received was "Those doctors weren't there and weren't the ones that would have had to tell you 'no'. Those doctors didn't see that you weren't ready to give up." She said that she knew that we weren't willing to quit without a fight, and that there was still a very slim chance things could have gotten better. She said she knew that no matter how small that chance we wanted to at least TRY. Knowing that Dr. Leeds realized we would have done anything meant a lot to me.

I asked Dr. Leeds if she would mind being the main doctor at Sun Life in charge of our pregnancy and she said she'd be honored. That she hoped to see me, when we were ready, pregnant again and that she would be happy to help bring that baby home with us. She said that my next pregnancy will mean all that much more to her because of what we'd been through together and that she would never forget Kelley, Christopher and I.

So, that is the latest update on "things". Kelley and I are doing okay still. I've had a few rough days, but I've gotten through those. Kelley has been amazing, always there for me in any way I need him. It's also been great to know that our friends and family are there too. Thank you, everyone, for all the prayers and good wishes you are sending our way, they mean more than words could ever say.

~Tammy~