The future...

First, I want to thank everyone for the support you have given to both Kelley and I. While we may not take everyone up on the offers to talk, or for whatever else we need, it means a lot to us. Just knowing that there are people out there praying for us, thinking about us, and there if we need them makes it easier to keep going. It's sort of like a fisherman and the coast guard... they hope they never need the help of the coast guard but it's comforting knowing they are there if they do.

I figured I would let everyone know what the tentative plans are right now.

This blog is going to keep going. When I started this blog it was going to be the story of my pregnancy, bringing my son/daughter into the world, and the ups and downs of raising our baby to be a happy, healthy, caring person. No one could have seen in advance the turns that took place during the pregnancy, or ending the pregnancy. As far as the future, I hope the blog will go the same way, the story just isn't going to be as quick and concise as we'd hoped.

Kelley and I still want a child. Whether that child in the end is borne from me, or we adopt, we will at some point have a child in our lives. Kelley and I have both decided that we would like to try again for a baby when we can. The doctors have given me the time frame for when we can try again, and when we are mentally and physically ready we will.

As far as the reason we lost Christopher, it was due to finding out I have an "incompetent cervix". What this means is that my cervix simply is not strong to hold a baby in. Basically the cervix starts opening and your body cannot hold the baby in. Based on what I've read, and heard, more than 25% of second trimester losses are attributed to incompetent cervix. That number they believe should be much higher as too often babies are lost without them knowing why - and the only way to be sure it's the IC is to do ultrasounds of the cervix. I've also found that about 2% of all pregnancies deal with an incompetent cervix - which to me is a pretty high number.

There has been a ton of research done on incompetent cervix, ways to prevent it, what causes it, and how to tell if a woman is going to deal with it. Research has found precious little information. They have yet to find anything that can prevent someone from having IC, and they have not found any way of telling in advance if or when a woman will deal with IC.

What does this mean for a future pregnancy? What this means is that if/when we become pregnant again I can look forward to many many more doctor visits. From what I've heard I will have at the least bi-weekly ultrasounds checking my cervix, and possible twice weekly visits.

They have something they call a "cerclage" that will be put in place between weeks 12-16 of the pregnancy. A cerclage is basically them tying or stitching the cervix closed so that it cannot open early, it's a small surgery. When I reach weeks 36 plus in the pregnancy at some point they will go in and take out the cerclage. There are quite a few risks to having a cerclage done, but it's positives outweight those by far.

What are the risks? Having the cerclage put in can cause infection, and it can also a miscarriage. I could also go into preterm labor just having the cerclage put in. Later during the pregnancy if I start having contraction that can cause serious problems with the cerclage - and could even cause the cerclage to rip my cervix. So often the woman is given medication, shots or pills, to take if she thinks she is feeling contractions to prevent this.

Depending on how the pregancy goes I may have no limitations extra compared to a "regular" pregnancy, or I could end up on bedrest for most of the pregnancy. It all depends on God, my body, and the baby.

Thank you again for your thoughts and prayers, it's heartening to know that so many people care about us.